Hey Mama

No one tells you about the “other side” of having a baby. The not-so fun, dirty, lonely, or dark side. 

First of all, No one tells you that right after having the baby, you will still look about 6 months pregnant, just slightly more deflated.

No one tells you that mesh underwear and giant menstrual pads will be your best friends, for a long time.

No one tells you that breastfeeding can be so very painful. And so very difficult.

No one tells you that your heart will feel like it’s going to burst with love, happiness, sadness, anxiety and exhaustion all at the same time.

No one tells you that even though friends and family are so vocally supportive before and after the baby comes, you’ll feel too guilty/shy/shameful to actually ask them to come and help you.

No one tells you that your gorgeous hair you grew over the past 9 months starts falling out in freaking handfuls, clogging your shower drain.

No one tells you that sex is the LAST thing on your mind for a long time, but your partner will have a hard time being patient.

No one tells you that you will constantly question yourself and your fitness as a parent, resist the urge to call the pediatrician 15 times a day, and have mini panic attacks any time baby coughs.

No one tells you how maternity leave can be an amazing time to bond with your baby, but if you’re feeling depressed or anxious, it can feel like you are trapped alone in a prison.

No one tells you that little boys will pee straight up into the air (or in your face) if you’re not quick enough with the diaper change.

No one tells you that going back to work from maternity leave feels like ripping your heart out of your chest and giving it to a stranger to hold all day while you pretend to be productive at your job.

No one tells you that your partner just won’t understand “why you’re so sad, isn’t this what you wanted?”

No one tells you that you will feel like such a failure for feeling the way you do, and that you’ll cry yourself to sleep at night.

I want you to tell you, you’re not alone. I see you. And you’re doing an amazing job.

6 thoughts on “Hey Mama”

  1. Alena says:

    So much truth! Thank you for this post 🙂

    1. Erin Spencer says:

      Thank you for reading Alena!!

  2. Arianna says:

    The heart in this was undeniable. You’re not alone either, even though you’ll feel like you are regardless. Hugs beyond hugs to you.

    1. Erin Spencer says:

      Thanks Ariana! Definitely a lot of pieces of myself in this post, and I hope that other moms feel a little less alone in reading this! Reaching out for help can be so hard, I hope to make it a little easier to do so 🙂
      -Erin

  3. This is such an amazing post! I want to print it out and hand it to new mamas! Thank you.

    1. Erin Spencer says:

      Thank you, Megan! That means a lot to me!
      -Erin

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